Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Is it ok to bribe?

On Sunday Tori had to give her first talk in church. I was a little nervous, because about a month ago she had to say the theme, and when she got up there she refused to say it, and I ended up having to say it, and I turned out saying the wrong months theme, and all the kids laughed, and yeah, you get the point. I was determined that we would not have a repeat of last time. Well, I didn't get off to a great start, because I totally forgot about the talk until Sunday morning. So I hurried and popped my "Tiny Talks For Kids" CD into the computer, and found a lesson that went along with the theme. I then showed it to Tori and explained that she was giving a talk in primary, and I would help her. We practiced it a few times. She started to get a little uneasy about the whole thing, so I told her that if she went up there and said her whole talk in the microphone without me having to say anything then the next day I would take her to the store and let her pick out any candy she wanted. Well, this got her excited, and she went on the practice it a few times perfectly. So we get to church, and all through sacrament meeting she acted a little strange. Her face was all flushed, she didn't want to color, and she just sat on Brandon's lap the whole time sucking her thumb. I would say she had a classic case of the butterflies. I began to get nervous. When it was time to go to class, her mood didn't change. I finally got her to sit with her class, but I had to sit next to her for a few minutes. In our primary they do the talks at the very end of Primary, so I told her I would be back to help her at the end. So I went on to my class, and then to Relief Society. I got so wrapped up in the lesson, that I totally forgot about her talk! I looked up at the clock, and noticed it was ten till 2, which is when she was supposed to be giving it. I let out a huge gasp, and hurried and ran out. I am sure everyone was wondering what my deal was. As I hurried down the hall, the primary secretary saw me, and could tell that I was panicked, so she told me that I didn't miss anything, and that they were just starting. When Tori saw me she was all smiles, and it seemed that her butterflies had gone away. When it came time for Tori to give her talk, I went up there with her, and held up the picture and whispered in her ear the first thing she needed to say. She said it so cutely into the microphone, but then, her nerves took over. She hunched down and said, "I don't want to do it". I quickly whispered in her ear, "Don't forget about your candy." This made her pop right up and say the next line. She got through a few more lines and then got nervous again and didn't want to go on. So again, I whisper "I guess you don't want a candy." She straightened right up and continued on. This went on through out the whole talk. At one point towards the end I was in such desperation, I whispered, "You can have the biggest candy you can find!". She got through the whole talk and said every line into the microphone. I was so proud. This brings me to my question. Is it OK to bribe? I say go for it! (Depending on the situation of course). It sure helped me out in this situation. Here is Tori with the candy she picked out, Sour Gummy Worms.

6 comments:

The Mattinson's said...

I think a little bribe now and then never hurt any child. Just don't get in the habit of it for every talk then she will expect it.

Babzanne Barker said...

That was hilarious! I love the picture and I think your bribe was just fine. If you want, you can always call it an incentive instead. Now that she knows she can give a talk without fainting, crying, or throwing up she probably won't need the bribe--I mean incentive--next time. :)

Aspen said...

I am all for bribes! That is how we got Sadie to start going to Nursery, and now she loves it! If that's what Tori needs to get the extra confidence to do something then so be it. Hey...would your girls be interested in doing a sticker chain letter? If so, email me your address so I can mail a letter to them.

Kristalyn said...

I think that this was a great way to teach Tori about setting goals! She had the goal of getting some candy...and she accomplished it! I used to treat myself to candy or some sort of sweet after hard chemistry tests in college. Good job Tori!

Cierra said...

What a funny story:) Your kids are so cute! Keep up the good work!

Linda said...

I promised Vince a fishing trip if he'd memorize his first talk inSacrament meeting!